The last somewhat personal blog post I made (here on July 26), was not widely read, but today I am sharing more personal reflections indirectly related to that post—and to my 83rd birthday, which is tomorrow (Aug. 15).
A Wonderful Life
Although I am experiencing a definite decline in physical energy and the need for multiple 10-minute naps every day, I am happy to say that at the end of my 83rd year I am basically healthy. (Yes, the birthday number marks the end of that year.)
Moreover, I am also basically happy. Last year I published a book mainly for my children and grandchildren. The subtitle of that 186-page book is The Story of My Life from Birth until my 82nd Birthday (1938~2020). But the main title, A Wonderful Life, is problematic.I wrote in the book’s conclusion that “to this point I can
honestly say that it has been a wonderful life—and I don’t mean wonderful in
the sense that I should be praised for it, but wonderful in the sense that I
have for the most part enjoyed the last nearly 80 years that I can remember.”
I can, thankfully, say the same thing now, a year later.
In the book’s brief conclusion, which I finished exactly one
year ago today, I wrote, “I thank God for blessing me with a wonderful life. I
have received God’s grace (unmerited favor) in manifold ways, and I am deeply
thankful for those blessings.”
I fully agree with that statement now, a year later. But
what can I say to those who have not been blessed so bountifully? I am more and
more seeing this as problematic.
Miserable Lives
We have all heard the words, “There, but for the grace of God,
go I.” Those words are generally spoken as an expression of humility,
acknowledging that the good fortune one enjoys is due to God’s grace rather
than to one’s own ability or goodness.
That is all well and good. But here’s the problem: why isn’t
God’s grace more available for all the many people who are suffering so miserably?
Certainly, we must recognize that some people have miserable
lives because of bad choices they have made in the distant or recent past. For example,
more and more people are suffering right now because they spurned covid-19 vaccinations.
However, many suffer through no fault of their own. The
miserable life of some people is directly linked to having been born into a
dysfunctional or an economically poor family.
Or they haven’t experienced what I have because of my white
privilege, male privilege, Christian privilege, and straight/cis privilege,
etc. (This is in no way meant to demean BIPOC, females, non-Christians, or
LBGTQ people; rather, it recognizes that many such persons lack advantages I
have had.)
Compassionate Lives
Perhaps we hurt others unintentionally when we “brag” about
what we have received “by the grace of God.” Instead of thinking about
ourselves and how well off we are, we need to think more about the needs of
others—and work to help disadvantaged people experience more of God’s grace.
That is, many of us need to talk less about our blessings
and listen more compassionately to others talk about their needs.
I have a couple of cousins who regularly post Christian
content (memes) on Facebook. Last week they both posted about how good God has
been to them—and I am truly happy that they are experiencing and acknowledging God’s
blessings.
But one of those cousins also often posts negative things
about “illegal aliens” and the problems they cause in the U.S. Most of those
she criticizes, though, are desperately seeking to improve their misfortunate
lives.
Why isn’t God good to them also? Why does my cousin
experience God’s grace so much more than the suffering refugees and immigrants
from south-of-the-border?
And shouldn’t being graced by God make us more gracious?
So, but
for because of the grace of God, go
I will . . . .
Here are pertinent comments from Thinking Friend Glenn Hinson in Kentucky:
ReplyDelete"You raise the question I have wrestled with for many years, Leroy, specifically with reference to my brother’s death at age 36. Why me? From either the fortunate or the unfortunate is surely a question we need to face."
And these poignant comments from Thinking Friend Michael Olmsted in Springfield, Mo,:
ReplyDelete"Very well said.
"I am presently facing the greatest heartache of my life. The love of my life ... the woman I believe God brought into my life is now in a care facility because she has Alzheimer's. We have had a wonderful life in ministry and in personal ways as well and I treasure those 52 years of ministry and challenges. Daily I find myself remembering
challenging and blessed times.
"Remembering is a rich experience, including the hard times, because it is a chronicle of God's care even when life was disappointing. My foundation of hope is not in any sense of success but in accepting each day as a gift from God in which I can learn, grow, and know his unfailing love each moment. It's a bit like my mother told me when I was young: 'Remember, Michael, no matter what I love you.'
"Life is a gift, don't waste it!"
Michael, my heart aches for you and your beloved wife as you live through this terrible circumstance that so many of us dread the thought of. I remember her as so beautiful, loving and gracious during that period when you served as interim at Second Baptist here in Liberty where we were members then. I am so sorry that you have lost her companionship in so many ways now. Prayers for both of you. June Seat
ReplyDeleteWishing you a Pleasant Birthday on your 83rd Leroy and may our LORD Bless you with many more Healthy years so you can continue to Bless me and Others.
ReplyDeleteI so agree with your statements in your Blog that we should think more of the needs of Others who are less fortunate than us.
Just yesterday, I read again the Love chapter in The Bible(1 Cor.13) and it tells us what we should do as Christians.
Thanks again Leroy for sharing your Heart with us.
His Servant,
John(Tim)Carr
Thanks, John Tim -- and soon you will be celebrating your 83rd as well. -- I am so happy your stay in hospice was short-lived and that your life on this earth is going to be longer-lived!
DeleteLeroy, Happy Birthday 83! I wish you to celebrate a wonderful and great birthday with your lovely family and your good health. I remember our happy years of 1979-82 in Fukuoka with your family and all the love and friendship. One year, I was asked to take a school picture of FIS and I had one class picture of lovely Karen and my son JP. It was a wonderful world.
ReplyDeleteThanks, Ed! -- Wow, it's hard to believe that we first met in Fukuoka over 40 years ago, and I am pleased that I still have contact with you and with J.P., your outstanding son. He and my daughter Karen have both done quite well in spite of having gone to such a small elementary school. -- My "wonderful life" was certainly enhanced by having friends like you and your fine family.
DeleteLocal friend Ed Kail sent the following comments by email:
ReplyDelete"One problem with the saying “There, but for the grace of God, go I…” is the comparison of self with others. It often is flavored by categorization of the 'other' according to some visible criterion (or an assumed one), from which we easily move into comparison and then evaluation of the other. Such unconscious thought processes are at the root of racism and other 'isms,' and they are strengthened when we consciously choose to compare our lives with those of others — usually to our advantage, or in expression of privilege, recognized or not. We can dress up our comparison / evaluation with the 'grace of God,' but it might be more sincere if we simply identified our 'blessings' and gave thanks for them in the moment."
Thanks for your thoughtful comments, Ed.
DeleteA widely circulated story has it that the phrase was first spoken by the English evangelical preacher and martyr, John Bradford (c.1510~1555). He is said to have uttered the variant of the expression - "There but for the grace of God, goes John Bradford," when seeing criminals being led to the scaffold.
Then I received these meaningful comments from Thinking Friend Eric Dollard in Chicago:
ReplyDelete"Thanks, Leroy, for your comments about the grace of God.
"My moral philosophy rests on two basic axioms. First, the life and dignity of every human being is sacred. Second, we earn nothing; everything is ultimately a gift from God or good (or for many, bad) luck. I too have lived well, but I have earned none of my blessings; I was fortunate enough to be born into very favorable circumstances (i.e., born with good health as a white, heterosexual male in America to caring parents) as were you and many others. This good fortune implies a strong moral obligation to help the less fortunate.
"Immigration is a difficult issue, too complicated for an email discussion, but I will say that we have a moral obligation to treat immigrants, whether documented or not, with compassion."
Yes, when Christians say, “We’re so blessed,” a less “blessed” person can be left feeling, “They must think God doesn’t love us as much.”
ReplyDelete“We’re so blessed” can also sound like they might be ready to add, “… knock on wood.”
So whether it leaves you with the feeling that God might strike us dead at any time or God blesses this one and not that one, the assumption is that God not only sustains the world with rain and sunshine, sending both to the righteous and the unrighteous, but runs the show like we’re all puppets in it.
Thanks, Fred, for your thoughtful comments. Yes, it is hard to separate feelings of gratitude from what are often feelings of entitlement and superiority over those who have not been so "blessed."
DeleteThanks for this blog post Leroy, and wishing you blessings on your birthday.
ReplyDeleteI've often wondered too why some are so blessed and others are not. I think there are a variety of answers for the variety of circumstances people find themselves in.
However, to generalize, and perhaps over simplify, I think the main reason people are not blessed is because of the power of evil and sin at work in the world and in people's lives. I find it depressing and sobering that there seem to be a growing number of tyrannical governments and dictatorships around the world today that cause far too much suffering for far too many people.
Thanks for the birthday wishes and for your comments, Garth.
DeleteYes, there are certainly many people who are suffering much today because of tyrannical governments. And we in the U.S. or in Canada as you are can thank God that by his grace we live in better countries--but there are a lot who suffer, unjustly, in our countries also. And what are people of goodwill to do to help alleviate the suffering in countries such as Afghanistan now, where more and more people, especially women, are likely to suffer under the rule of the Taliban? I don't think war is the answer, but what can peace-loving people do? That is what I am trying to think more about now.
ReplyDeleteExcellent, Leroy. Much said with few words.
I connect with diminishing strength observation. However, I want to respond to the second section. Your thoughts remind me of part of a verse of "Amazing Grace": 'Tis grace hath brought me safe thus far and grace will lead me home. I am also reminded of the Charter for Compassion and the UN Charter of Human Rights. Then there are the Golden Rule and Jesus' summary of the Law. Our struggle is not with a lack of knowledge of how to respond to our neighbor in need but the will to do so with love of Jesus.
To open our eyes to those who need compassionate understanding and action in today's world, we may need to be prodded by other voices. Have you read: "Caste," "How to Be An Anti-Racist," or "White Fragility"? These are not difficult to read but are sometimes painful.
It's been a wonderful journey from where I was 83 years ago (at SBTS surprisingly; my Dad was a seminary student), until today. By grace divine and human, I move on and hopefully will be a witness of grace to all.
Jerry Warmath
Thanks, Jerry, for your significant comments--and for mentioning "Amazing Grace." The 30th (last) chapter of my book "Thirty Things Everyone Needs to Know Now" is "God's First and Last Word is Always Grace," and if I were writing that now, I probably would emphasize more the words you end with, the call to be "a witness of grace to all."
DeleteI have read some of both books you mentioned, and I agree that they are good and important books that we Whites need to think deeply about and to respond to with more gracious action for the benefit of those who have suffered because of the White privilege many of us have been "blessed" with.
Bro. Leroy,
ReplyDeleteHappy Birthday! I hope you had the chance to eat all the bad stuff like chocolate cake you wanted. I particularly liked your rephrasing of your theme/title. Now in retirement my wife and I are seeing how much God has blessed us in preparation for this time in our lives, and we are blessed to share those blessings with others. To whom much is given much is required. Grace is most beautiful when shared.
Thanks, Tom, for the birthday greetings. -- And I really like the two short sentences at the end of your comments.
DeleteHappy birthday, Leroy!
ReplyDeleteThe way you live your life with purpose and dignity is an inspiration to us all.
Thank you for encouraging us to pause and reflect on our unmerited blessings.
May you live to see many more days overflowing with blessings to those around you.
Sincerely,
Ray
Thanks, Ray, for your kind words!
DeleteIn my experience, the phrase, “but for the grace of God…” is normally used within Christian circles, not as part of a gospel presentation, although I am sure the latter happens. I can see how the phrase would be problematic if overheard by anyone, within or without the Christian community, experiencing the lesser circumstances in question.
ReplyDeleteThe past year and a half has been a time of reckoning for privileged white Americans (U. S. citizens) like ourselves. We struggle with the abundant blessings we enjoy simply by our seemingly accidental circumstances. We have inherited immense material and social benefits at the expense of first nation peoples, former slaves, and other victims of America’s colonial expansion and unbridled capitalism. Perhaps our consciences would be assuaged if we could export our western lifestyles to the rest of the world. But the planet could not sustain such a thing, even if it were possible.
At the same time, I know I have been guilty in my “wealthy compassion” of ignoring the richness of community experienced by many of those “less fortunate” than ourselves. Perhaps we are the ones to be pitied.
Yet our greatest blessings are spiritual in nature. When the gospel takes root in a society there is an uplifting transformation in all its social systems. When Christians choose to obey scripture, destructive habits like gambling, prostitution, and alcohol/drug abuse disappear. Perhaps the greatest injustice in the world lies in the fact that so many have been denied access to the gospel, either through religious opposition or the lack of workers for the harvest.
I appreciate your comments, “Because of the grade of God…” and the comments of your thinking friend, Tom. “With great privilege comes great responsibility.” “Grace is most beautiful when shared.”
For what is worth…
Ray
Thanks, Ray, for taking time to post these important comments—and I think they are worth a lot (and I apologize for being so slow in saying so).
DeleteI fully agree that many people suffer because of the bad choices they make and that becoming a Christian can and does take care of many destructive habits such as those you mentioned. On the other hand, many people suffer because of societal issues that they are not responsible for and which they have not chosen. I am thinking, for example, of those who suffer because of poverty, racism, homophobia, etc. So many of us who have been “blessed” have not done nearly enough in combatting such societal evils.
And yes, I also agree with the comments of Thinking Friend Tom, whom I had the privilege of baptizing in 1959.