Thoughts on My 85th Birthday

Today (August 15, 2023) is my 85^th birthday. That being so, I am sharing personal reflections on this milestone day. 

I am truly grateful to still be alive and “sound in mind and body.” Many don’t live this long. Three of my closest lifetime friends have been gone for years now: Bobby Pinkerton (1937~2008), Clyde Tilley (1935~2013), and Joe Wolven (1939~2015). I still miss them.

Although I am happy to say I have no illness of any kind, I am experiencing reduced activity, and especially markedly reduced travel, because of the decrease in physical energy/stamina.

At this point, I am not planning to go with June to attend our beloved grandson David’s wedding in Georgia the first of next month, and I will also likely not make the trip to south Missouri later in September for the burial of June’s only brother, who passed away early this month at the age of 88.

Thankfully, modern technology makes significant connectedness possible from the comfort of one’s own home—and for introverts such as I, being home, even home alone, is often more enjoyable than being in a crowd of people.

I can honestly say that overall, I have had a wonderful life during these 85 years. Three years ago, I published a brief book for my children and grandchildren with the subtitle The Story of My Life from Birth until My 82^nd Birthday (1938~2020). The book’s title is A Wonderful Life.

As I wrote on the first page, that title “is not an evaluation I have heard from others. In fact, some may well think my life has not been particularly wonderful—and that’s all right.” The point is that I believe that I have had a wonderful life, and I am genuinely grateful for how my life has been graced.

Tomorrow and in the following weeks, I will continue revising and updating that book with the goal of publishing a new edition of it, with numbers in the subtitle changed to 85^th and 2023, before the end of the year.

However, for as long as possible I want to continue focusing on the present and the future rather than the past. I plan to keep reading, thinking, and writing blog articles (and perhaps an occasional book review).

I want my grandchildren, and their children, to know something about my life story, but I am even more interested in trying to share with them knowledge and, hopefully, wisdom about the world as it is now and is likely to become.

I deeply desire to leave a meaningful legacy to my descendants, but not a legacy of material things or of things past. I hope to leave them a legacy that will encourage them to think critically, meaningfully, and creatively. I also want to motivate them to think deeply about the meaning of life.

To that end, last month I wrote a letter to my great-grandson on his first birthday, asking his parents to keep it for him to read years from now. I decided then that for as long as possible I will write a thoughtful letter to each of my family members on their birthday.

Yesterday I wrote a letter to my youngest grandson on his 16^th birthday. And today I will finish writing a letter to my oldest son, whose birth on August 15 was the best birthday present I ever received.

Looking forward, I want to do all I can to help my children/grandchildren, and as many other people as possible, to think well and to choose wisely, in order that they, too, will have as wonderful a life as possible—and a life that will make a positive contribution to peace and justice in the world.  

In closing, I am sharing this little poem I have written for today:

I’m eighty-five and still alive.
The good old days have parted ways,
but days are new and joyful too. 
So, I’ll go on ‘til time is gone
with gratitude my attitude 
and faith in God until the sod 
will cover me. And then I’ll see
 a blissful state, my lasting fate.

 

What about Altruism/Charity/Philanthropy?

Why do people give money to needy people or public causes? Why should people make charitable or philanthropic contributions? What is altruism and how can it best be implemented? These are questions worth careful consideration.  

Give because of Greed?

Some of us grew up in churches that stressed tithing—and I have been a tither my whole life and encouraged tithing when I was a pastor. But I never told people that tithing was a means for receiving God’s blessings and to receive more from God than they ever gave to God and God’s work.

There are preachers, though, who have appealed to people’s “greed” to encourage them to tithe. “If you tithe, God will reward you by increasing your income” was the appalling “pitch” some preachers used, seeking to bolster the church’s financial income.

More generally, there are those who give because of the “greedy” desire for the good feelings they get from contributing to the emotional appeals by charitable organizations and/or needy people.

Perhaps greed is too strong a word to use here, but I simply mean the strong desire to get more of something, such as more blessings and (maybe) money or more feelings of self-satisfaction.

Give because of Guilt?

Historically, two of the most generous philanthropists in the U.S. were Andrew Carnegie and John D. Rockefeller.

Carnegie (1835~1919) made his fortune in the steel industry, and the wealth of Rockefeller (1839~1937) came largely from profits he made from the Standard Oil Company, which he established in 1870.

The philanthropy of those two industrialists is clearly visible in the worldwide Carnegie libraries and the work of the Rockefeller Foundation. And without doubt, multitudes of people have been helped by the philanthropic gifts of those two men .**

However, recently June and I have watched (on DVD) The Men Who Built America, the six-hour miniseries docudrama originally broadcast on the History Channel in 2012, and we have seen an apparently accurate portrayal of the ruthlessness of those two tycoons and the harm they did to so many.

Particularly horrifying were the catastrophic Johnstown Flood of 1889 and the Homestead Steel Mill Strike/Massacre of 1892. The docudrama clearly depicts Carnegie’s culpability in both of those tragedies.

That excellent miniseries, though, fails to note that those catastrophes occurred during the very time Walter Rauschenbusch was pastor in the Hell’s Kitchen area of New York City and beginning to emphasize what came to be known as the Social Gospel (see my 9/30 blog post).

Even though Carnegie had built a few libraries before those events that significantly tarnished his good name, most of his philanthropic work was after them and most likely at least partly rooted in his sense of guilt and his desire to restore his reputation.

Give because of Gratitude?

In the New Testament, Matthew quotes Jesus as saying, “Freely you have received; freely give” (10:8, NIV). Accordingly, it is obvious that the best reason for altruistic giving is not because of “greed” or guilt but because of gratitude.

A strong sense of gratitude goads us to give graciously to help others. But how is the best way to give? Just acting upon our subjective feelings may not be best.

In recent years, an “effective altruism” movement has been popular in some circles. It recommends rationally considering ways to give that will produce the greatest good for the greatest number of people rather than giving on the basis of emotional appeals and feel-good causes.

(You may want to check out this website: Using reason and evidence to do the most good - Effective Altruism.)

Interestingly, two major proponents of effective altruism are non-religious thinkers/writers: Peter Singer (b. 1946) and Steven Pinker (b. 1954). To learn more about them, see Singer’s 2013 TED talk and this 2021 interview with Pinker.

There is also an Effective Altruism for Christians website (see here). I also encourage you to (re)read Guidelines for Charitable Giving, my blog post for Nov. 30, 2010.

Yes, there is much to consider with regard to altruism/charity/philanthropy.

_____

** I wrote about those two outstanding philanthropists in my Sept. 15, 2017, blog post titled “Problems with Philanthropy,” and it is worth reading again.

Don't Grieve, Give Thanks

Even though I had another article ready to post today, I decided to postpone it and instead to post the following reflections about my brief trip to Japan, which ends today. (I am scheduled to arrive back in Kansas City just after noon today.)

Grieving What Is No More

During my first and last full days in Japan, October 3 and 8, I experienced considerable sadness at the strong likelihood that this would be my last time in Japan. Especially on Monday evening, I walked around familiar places with tears in my eyes because the next morning I was going to be leaving the place I have loved so much.

As I was jogging early Tuesday morning, though, I started thinking about the words that I had called to mind last week after visiting my good friend Otsuka Kumiko-san, who has terminal cancer: Don’t grieve over what is no more; rather, give thanks for what once was.

I began to apply those words to myself and my grieving because of leaving Japan for the last time.

Giving Thanks for What Once Was

So, yesterday morning I began to give thanks for each thing I had been feeling sad about, including the following:

** I am thankful for the Southern Baptist Foreign Mission Board, as it was called then, for appointing June and me as missionaries to Japan in 1966 and for supporting us throughout our 38 years there. The Southern Baptist Convention has changed through the years and I am no longer able to be a Southern Baptist; nevertheless, I am deeply grateful for what once was.

** I am thankful for Seinan Gakuin, the school system in Fukuoka City that Southern Baptist missionaries founded in 1916, and for the trustees electing me to the university faculty 50 years ago. I am deeply grateful for the privilege of being able to teach there for 36 years and to serve as chancellor during my final eight years in Japan.

** I am thankful for Hirao Baptist Church, which June and I joined 50 years ago and which was our church home for twelve years. I am also thankful Hirao Church sponsored us in starting the Fukuoka International Church (FIC) and that I was able to serve for 24 years as part-time pastor of that church.

** I am thankful for many Japanese friends, mentors, and co-workers--especially Otsuka Kumiko-san (about whom I wrote, here, on Sept. 5) and Kaneko Sumio-sensei, who was the pastor of Hirao Church for most of the years we attended there. I am thankful for the good visits I had with Otsuka-san on Oct. 3-4  and with Kaneko-sensei on Oct. 4.

** I am thankful for the many former FIC congregants whom I fondly remember--and especially those I was able to visit with over a delicious meal on Oct. 6. That gathering was organized by Fukuoka Kikuko-san, who was the first person I had the privilege of baptizing as pastor of FIC.

** I am thankful for the many students that I had the privilege of teaching at Seinan Gakuin University and especially those with whom I still have contact--such as those I met with on the afternoon of Oct. 8 for a delightful two hours.

What a Difference It Makes!

At dusk on Monday when I left the gathering of former students just mentioned, I walked around familiar places for about two hours, grieving at having to leave Japan for the last time the next day. It was a sad time of thinking of what will be no more, at least of direct experience in Japan.

But Tuesday morning each time I began to have sad thoughts, I would give thanks for what has been--and what a difference that made in how I felt!

Thank you for allowing me to share some of my thoughts / experiences of the past week. In spite of this article being mostly about me, I hope many of you will remember, and profit from, the main point:

Don’t grieve over what is no more; rather, give thanks for what once was.

Reflections upon Turning Eighty

Today is my 80^th birthday, so rather than writing about theological / ethical / political matters as I often do, this article is mostly personal. Although I had nearly finished "Temptations upon Turning Eighty," the article I originally planned for today, I decided to scrap it and to focus instead on gratitude rather than on temptations. 

Gratitude

Theologian Diana Butler Bass’s new (2018) book is titled Grateful: The Transformative Power of Giving Thanks. Although I have not yet read it all, I think Bass's book is basically correct, so I begin these reflections by expressing my gratitude for the following:

(1) I am thankful for good health. Except for a small pill I take each morning for high blood pressure and another small pill I take each evening for cholesterol, I seem to have no other health problems that are not kept under control with diet and exercise. (That is why I am not yielding to the temptations to quit jogging or just to eat whatever I want.)

Also, I am grateful for good genes as well as for good health: my father was quite healthy until four days before he died at age 92.

(2) I am thankful for a good wife and a good family. As many of you know, June and I married in May 1957, the same month we graduated from Southwest Baptist College ( a junior college then, a university now). I was still 18 and June was 19.

Then on this day, August 15, the next year, our son precious Keith was born. Today we are celebrating, together, his 60^th birthday along with my 80^th birthday.

After Keith, we had three more children, and now we also have seven grandchildren. I am most thankful for the good wife and mother June has been all these years and also grateful for the fine people our children and grandchildren are—and are becoming.

(3) I am thankful for my calling and for my career in Japan. As most of you know, June and I spent 38 years as missionaries to Japan, and I served for 36 years as a full-time professor and administrator at Seinan Gakuin (University) and the last 24 of those years also as a part-time pastor.

Our years in Japan were quite difficult in some ways, but very rewarding in most ways. I am deeply grateful for our calling to that field of service and for the challenges of seeking to fulfill that calling.

Regrets

When I wrote about June’s 80^th birthday last year (here), I said that “she has basically lived a life without regrets.” I can mostly say the same about myself—but still, there are some regrets.

I have absolutely no regrets about getting married so young and starting our family so soon. (If I had the choice, I would certainly do the same thing again.) But I do regret that through the years I was not a better husband and a better father. There are many ways I could have—and should have—done better.

Also, as implied above, I have absolutely no regret about living and serving in Japan for 38 years. (Once more, if I had the choice, here also I would do the same thing again.) But I do regret that I was not able to be a more effective teacher, a more effective pastor, and a more effective administrator.

Gratitude Tops Regret

Still, there is no use of harboring any regrets for the past, which cannot be changed--or in worrying about the future. So I am determined to live in the present, today and in all the days ahead, with gratitude, bearing in mind these wise words:

By Ann Voscamp