The Ghanaian wood carving is of a hand holding an egg. It is a deeply symbolic piece rooted in the Asante (or Ashanti) cultural tradition. During many of the years she was in Ghana, Cousin Carolyn (1942~2019) lived in Kumasi, the capital of the Asante region, and spoke Twi, the local language.**
On his website (see here), a Ghanaian artist says he carves the hand holding an egg sculptures with a powerful African proverb in mind. That proverb is about the delicate nature of leadership and authority in Ghanaian culture. Here is the English translation of that proverb:
To be a ruler is like holding an egg in the hand; if it is pressed too hard it breaks; but if not held tightly enough it may slip and smash on the ground.
The metaphor shown in the hand-holding-egg
carving stresses that authority is not absolute
or unbreakable, that leadership must be firm enough to maintain control and
effectiveness yet gentle enough not to destroy trust, and that true leadership
requires restraint and careful judgment.
The symbolism of the wood carving is applicable
to various relationships in addition to those of people in places of leadership
and authority. For example, it reminds supervisors and mentors to manage their relationships
with those “under” them in ways that inspire rather than intimidate.
The carving also speaks to the relationship
between friends, speaking of how to offer support and when to step back as well
as how to be present without being intrusive.
In romantic relationships, the image of a hand
holding an egg portrays the delicate balance between intimacy and independence,
between caring deeply and avoiding possessiveness.
The egg metaphor also depicts the challenge of parenting. As I have done previously, I asked Claude, my AI “friend,” if the egg-in-hand carving could be related to the challenge of being a good parent. Here is the first paragraph of the answer I received:
The egg metaphor captures the essential challenge of parenting: how to provide guidance, protection, and structure while allowing space for growth and independence. Parents who grip too tightly may crush their children's spirit, confidence, or natural development. Those who hold too loosely risk their children falling into harm or lacking the security they need.
I thought that was an excellent statement, and I
soon began to think about my own parents and their parenting practices of 75
years ago, which I still remember with appreciation.
My parents never went to college, and I am quite
sure they didn’t read any books about child psychology or self-help books about
how to be good parents. But in thinking back to the summer in 1950 when I turned
12 until I started college in the fall of 1955, I think they were exceptionally
good parents.
As we lived on a farm, probably already by 1950 my
parents had given me baby livestock, which I raised and then sold their
offspring. As I wrote in my book subtitled The Story My Life, my father “was
wise in getting me started at a young age in making money on the farm.”
On the following page, I wrote that my parents “were
skillful in helping me gain a sense of independence from a very early age—and I
have always appreciated that.”
Long before they had seen the wood carving that
my father’s niece gave June and me, to an exemplary degree they put into
practice holding the “egg” with care, not too tightly or too loosely.
I think June and I also did that in rearing our
four children, the youngest of whom is now 53—but I guess you’d have to ask them
if they think we did, in fact, handle the egg with proper care.
_____
** Soon after Carolyn returned to the U.S. in 2010, I posted a blog article titled “In Praise of Cousin Carolyn” (you can access it here). She also lived for many years in Accra, the capital and largest city of Ghana. Kumasi is about 160 miles (by car) northwest of Accra.
